Because of My Love, I Hate You.

August 22, 2013

For most of my life, fear and doubt have been the subtle (and not so subtle) motivation for a lot of my beliefs and actions. These last couple of years, however, I have been waking up to the profound nature of love. God is love, and Christ is love personified. The more He is revealed, the more I see just how far apart doubt & fear are from love.

They don’t live in the same neighborhood.

They aren’t in the same zip code.

They are mortal enemies who hate each other.

As the scriptures say, perfect love drives out all fear. Doubt & fear have absolutely nothing to do with love. Often, doubt and fear are rationalized as ‘wisdom’ coming from a heart of love. Doubt & fear have a foul aroma, however. It is the stench of death. This death attempts to quench the life of love (Christ) in our inner beings. Thankfully, this stench is noticable to those who have been awakened to the scent of love. Death will not have the final word in the matter. Death has already been, and will eventually be, utterly destroyed.

Over the last few years, some have misinterpreted my revelation of love to mean that I do not believe in a holy hatred and judgement. This could not be further from the truth. The opposite of love is not hate, but fear. Love hates fear & doubt, but love NEVER fears or doubts. As a matter of fact, love is bringing a righteous judgement upon the head of fear & doubt.

A dear sister of mine in Christ, Brittany DiSalvo, wrote an article that beautifully communicates the perspective of love’s inevitible victory over fear and doubt. It touched my heart, and I’d like to share her words with you in today’s post. It is titled:

A Letter to Doubt from the Pen of Grace

Dear Doubt,

I understand why you persist. Your intentions are apparent and your effects are ugly.



A kill-joy…

You make an illusion of loose ends and unresolved issues to cause a chasing of the wind and further illusions of deficiency. You allure your subjects to paths without peace and clouds without rain. You are vicious.

Lately I have been particularly aware of your attraction to those who have been captured by a certain grace. You bombard their minds with humanly reasonable thoughts, far-from-living waters of the worst intent: To snuff out the hearts ablaze with grace’s flames.

You will do anything in your power to keep as many as possible from realizing the tender, zealous, earth-shattering, all-encompassing grace of God in Christ Jesus. You can’t do anything about His triumph over you, so you try to keep the earth-dwellers from experiencing the mystery of God. But oh how it must remind you of your defeat when a soul exhales into rest in the Spirit of the Living God and freely enjoys His ceaseless embrace!

You play dirty. And if I were you, I would too. Because I am sure you have seen the effects of this grace. I bet you writhe when I dance, and choke when I sing. Surely, you must know what you are up against. But in case you have forgotten, let me remind you. Not with my words, but with His power.

You are in an arena with the Lion of the tribe of Judah. You have come against those who are eternally more than conquerors. I am sure you remember your dealings with Him. You have come against warriors whom you are trying to blind to their weapons, yet their desperation leads them to realizing the power they have in the love of Jesus Christ. You have been disarmed. All you have to fight with are lies and schemes that are beautiful stories in the making.

And did you know that your attempts actually serve to aid in a person’s realization of the truth that sets them free? Do you realize that even your dirtiest scheme is picked up and used for your Enemy’s purposes? You are shooting arrows that are morphed into precious lilies. You are opening your mouth to bite and devour, but your attempt dissolves into a gentle kiss. You can’t win.

Who is sabotaging every one of your schemes? Who resurrects when you kill, restores when you steal, and rebuilds when you destroy? Who is sovereign? Who is Mighty to Save? Who makes all things new?

Who else but Jesus Christ the righteous? Who else but the Savior of the ones you can’t have?

You know Him, but not like I know Him. You hear His voice, but not the way I do. You too shudder in His presence, but not with delight. You have a future with Him, but mine is brighter. Bright, actually, with the glory of the Lamb that you thought you destroyed. You thought His blood meant His defeat…but it actually brought about yours. Sucker.

Grace is the name of the covenant that will never pass away. May the ones under this grace revel in it daily, walk in it freely, and intimately behold the One who brought it into existence. -Brittany DiSalvo-

Be encouraged brothers and sisters, love cannot be defeated.

Jamal Jivanjee

Jamal Jivanjee

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30 responses to Because of My Love, I Hate You.

  1. A timely reminder for me which is, as usual, spot-on! In my weakness I succumb to doubt and fear, but in His strength I can rise up and pass through that which plagues me, knowing not only that this is temporary, but that HE has already won this and every victory.

  2. David Breakeronenine Carothers August 22, 2013 at 2:10 pm

    Got me laughing, crying, shouting and praying all at once. I’m going to take this to the highest mountain and write it out for all to see……well maybe not like that, but I will grab my cb mic and tell those in my range, breaker breaker….lol. God bless you for sharing this as I am sharing it to my circle.

  3. What is odd is that sometimes a person doesn’t know they are in fear. That is more common than not. Only Love recognizes fear. ย Even if it is hidden deep within, because fear has certain characteristics, one being imprisioned in some sort of way, but “hidden” fear cannot hide from true Love. Fear hates Love because Love is fear’s destruction. Fear will react in the presence of true powerful love and give itself away. No hiding!

  4. In the very recent past I have ‘seen’ this flawed and foolish attempt to infiltrate our grace, and love. I want to express this is not a human attack, we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but wicked spirits.

    Brittany’s description is ‘spot’ on doubt, fear, and the older expression hate have no place in us, they ‘stick’ out like spots and blemishes on fruit that is rotten, and not fit for consumption.

    Love always wins, it is His way, and nothing can stand in His way, Love wins, and this is the good news.

  5. Shelby Shock Marsh August 22, 2013 at 2:41 pm

    Jamal, I am just now being awakened to these beautiful truths! However, until I was, sadly none of these writings on His wondrous grace were wholly understandable, Brittany’s poem captures why that was…and why so many of our siblings have yet to be awakened. There is an overwhelming feeling inside me that a GREAT awakening is happening very quickly right before our very eyes! So exciting to be part of it.

    • I see it too ๐Ÿ™‚ and rejoice and dance with you Shelby, as the Bride is getting prepared!

      In the Song of Songs the Bride is overwhelmed with the scent of her Beloved. His name alone is a trigger. Now I could be wrong, but I don’t believe there is a single expression of fear or doubt in the Song of Songs. There is only longing. Intense longing. She is an “army with banners”. A woman who knows what she wants.

      Son 8:7 “Many waters (of doubt and fear) cannot quench love, Neither can floods drown it. “

    • It is truly a privledge sister!

  6. Truth highlighted and beautifully written. I love this description of the battle in which we are all engaged in some way or other. Love conquers fear…

  7. I was just thinking about fear and I realized something. Something important, I think. Fear creates fear. Fear begets fear. In other words, fear in one part of our lives, even like from the past, creates new fear. And if not exposed by true Love, fear will continue to grow and infiltrate many parts of a person. Fear creates fear where fear once was not.

  8. Shelby Shock Marsh August 22, 2013 at 3:17 pm

    God just gave me clarity on this fear of loving others because they might reject me. Now everywhere I go I bring His love. In the bible Jesus says (paraphrase). It is not you they are rejecting, but it is me they are rejecting. That is how I perceive others now. If I offer love by smiling or saying something that is loving & it is not received (it is rejected) I no longer take it personally & because I don’t, I continue to openly, willingly & generously offer His love to everyone I come in contact with. Before I would cower, shrink-down & receive yet another wound in this harsh world. There is such freedom in giving His love.

  9. Thank you, Jamal and Brittany. I needed that.

  10. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, and Brittany’s letter, bro! Really powerful stuff.

    Fear is a wall-builder, and love begets intimacy. It’s so important to trust, and be trustworthy.

  11. Perfect Love or when Love has been perfected ‘in’ us there is no fear. We are set free, free to ‘Love like God’. This Love cannot be offended regardless of the situation. Perfect Love only knows Love, and we all know that…Love loves to Love.

  12. I love the things you wrote and they’re worth more than gold to me.

    You said that doubt and fear are often rationalized as “wisdom” coming from a heart of love.

    One of the things that has come up a lot for me is the thought/lie/accusation, “If i had more wisdom, i wouldn’t do this.” I hear it the most when I am the most compelled to love. It’s that raging war between the tree of knowledge and the tree of Life. It’s calling knowledge wisdom and alluding to something other than Christ, who became wisdom for us.

    He is the image of invisible Love and the exact representation of His nature.

    • Yes, I have found the ‘wisdom’ accusation to be the loudest when the compulsion to love is the greatest as well. Christ truly is the image of invisible love, and the exact representation of His nature. Thank you, great insight!

      Also, you are worth more than gold:)

  13. “Sucker.”

    Love it!

  14. Fear is an illusion, it’s not real, it’s a lie.

  15. Love this blog Jamal. Thank you for posting. Also am loving great comments!

    “And if not exposed by true Love, fear will continue to grow and infiltrate many parts of a person.” – Kat

    Fear can infiltrate, but when we see, know and live by Love, He will continue to grow and infiltrate every part of this person, who is the bride of Christ. May He continue to grow within and continue to be our supply.

  16. Brittany,

    Holy guacamole, sister….that was so full of The Spirit and the prophetic. I am actually stunned speechless in a good way, and will simply rest in this. Nicely done.

  17. as this Love is expressed from His Bride, His saints, His Holy ones, it comes from those who have no outward attraction, who appear as they have nothing to offer but…they have a fragrance about them, their words are graceful, and gracefilled, their words evoke calm, acceptance, compassion, and Love. these ‘little ones’ are mighty, mighty ‘in’ their Savior King, their Loving Bridegroom, their Hope, their Life, and the very source of their Love. this band appears outwardly to be misfits, but they fit together perfectly ‘in’ Him. they are free, for they are examples of:

    “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”

    free to live, to Love as they have been Loved, by the One who is Love…Jesus the Christ

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