Restored Windows & The Beautiful Intruder…

April 7, 2014

I’m convinced that there is no greater treasure in the world than knowing and experiencing the Lord’s heart. If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you’ll know that (from time to time) I share ‘letters’ written from the first person style of Christ. For me, these ‘letters’ have come from the texture of our Lord’s heart that He has developed in me over time. These ‘letters’ are very precious to me as they contain something of the Lord’s heart that was shared with me at a high cost.

In today’s post, I’d like to share a ‘letter’ with you that is one of my absolute favorites. I wrote it last year, and in all honesty, it’s a treasure that I’m hesitant to share with you here publicly. When I wrote it, I wasn’t sure it would be for public consumption. Nevertheless, I’m compelled to share it with you now. This treasure has changed my life and has begun to unlock the kingdom of our Lord in me in ways that no human words can describe.

As you read this letter, may you know that this is the texture of the love that our Lord has for you personally as a member of His bride. May you also know that this same texture of love that lives in you (Christ in you), is also the texture of love that exists in you for your brothers and sisters in Christ that you have been specifically given to in relationship.

I have included a song for you at the end of this letter. This song beautifully contains the heart of this letter, and is one that I hope you’ll listen to very carefully. Read this letter, and listen to the lyrics of this song. If you’re reading this post through your email inbox, you’ll need to visit this blog directly to access the song posted at the end of the letter. I trust and pray that He’ll translate His heart to you as you read and listen.

The Gaze

Dear sister, 

Do you know what my favorite past time is?  I love to gaze deeply into your eyes.  This is not easy for me to do, however.  You’re so preoccupied.  Your eyes are so shifty.  They lock onto something only long enough for you to formulate a thought, and then you’re on to something else.  Often I catch your gaze from across the room, and I see you.  You notice me as well, but not for long.  Acknowledging my gaze is awkward for you, because you don’t recognize that it’s really me looking through him.  Therefore, resting in that gaze has been impossible for you.  It’s where I live, however.  I just rest and wait for those moments.

I have given you my best.  I have put my best into the deepest part of you.  That’s where my light is.  For so long the brilliant light in your spirit was hidden behind a think veil, unable to penetrate into your soul.  Your soul was filled with utter darkness.  I was angry because I wanted to fill you, all of you, with the essence of my best that I put into your spirit.  So in my anger and wrath, I came and ripped that damned veil into two.  No longer would my light, my best, be kept hidden from your soul.  I intended to ‘flood all the compartments’, so to speak.  That’s exactly what happened.  

My home has a beautiful window in which that light can now be shared.  Before, your windows were darkened and my brilliance was not visible.  There was only darkness showing.  All that has changed now!  Did you know that My light is My sustenance, as much as it is yours?  When I want to behold My light, I look deeply into you; my home.  That’s where I have put the best of me.  My light is beautiful, but oh how beautiful it is in you!  

Would you share your light with me?  

Would you sit with me for a while?  

Let’s share a drink together, you and I.  Allow me to gaze at you.  It’s my favorite thing to do.  

“Fleets and armies I am not afraid,
To a different host I fall.
It’s the advances within your eyes, my Love,
That tear down every wall.” -Pamela Spock 
“Then was I in his eyes as one that found peace.”  Song of Solomon 8:10

“The eye is the lamp of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light.  But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness.  If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!” (Matthew 6:22-23, NASB)

“…the mystery which has been hidden from the past ages and generations, but has now been manifested to His saints, to whom God willed to make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles, which is Christ *IN* you, the hope of glory.” (Col. 1:26-27, NASB, emphasis mine)

“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.” (2 Cor. 3:18, NASB)

“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love…No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us”. (1 John 4:7-8, 12, NIV)

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Jamal Jivanjee

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16 responses to Restored Windows & The Beautiful Intruder…

  1. You touched my heart with your sharing this Jamal… These words are life to me and as I gaze into His and Those who are His ,”eyes of love ” I find the walls of fear that have been built up through the years come tumbling down and am finally able to receive what His heart has always wanted to give me … More of Him and it is so beautiful.
    Thank you for your obedience in sharing your heart . I love you dearly dear brother.

  2. Reading this post brought to mind the Peter Gabriel song.. In Your Eyes. And I did enjoy the post and the song.

  3. Mary O’Neal April 7, 2014 at 5:15 pm

    I am not sure what I should say. Waiting on Him……….., yes, thank you Jesus for the response.
    Twelve yrs. ago our church began Bikers Sunday, and we have it every year since then. We didn’t know what to expect. Bikers began filling the church property as we served them breakfast. They wore leathers with patches of every kind of biker’s language most of us took a deep breath as we read. Their hair was braided and body piercings and tats were numerous. Pastor didn’t prepare us properly, nor was he totally prepared. Special speaker was a biker who was the leader of hell’s angels. As he shared his testimony of how God loved him so much in his sin and hatred of everyone that his heart couldn’t stand up any longer in resisting God’s love for him, the whole place, bikers and all of us good church people, began to weep and experience this love of God that he had experienced. Were we there for them or they for us? Haven’t figured it out yet! Bikers still come every Aug. , over a hundred bikers every year, but our eyes and our hearts have been cleared of the darkness you speak about and the light of Jesus has entered them and brought clarity to who You are in them.. I feed on Jesus in them and they on Jesus in us. I can see this now, but better yet, that Jesus feeds on His light in me. He has put His light in me for Him to behold His light. Did I put that right? It’s as if God is waiting for me to just behold Him so He can behold Himself in me. That is just plain wild!! Back to the bikers, no more do we look at the flesh but only the spirits of the bikers. We see Jesus and how they can see who Jesus really is within us. It took us years to do this right, but more and more bikers are coming every year. Every year more light floods our hearts and minds. What a work God has done! This is what I have received from your post Jamal.

    • Jamal Jivanjee April 10, 2014 at 1:17 pm


      This statement from your comment jumps out at me:

      “Jesus feeds on His light in me. He has put His light in me for Him to behold His light”.

      That’s exactly right Mary, and it is truly stunning that He would do that. What an amazing reality this is. Thanks so much for sharing your comment.

  4. Whenever one of your blog posts pops up, my heart leaps, because I know that I will see a glimpse into the heart of God through someone else that loves and sees Him- and that is one of the greatest pleasures of life, and one that is rare at this depth. What you shared was meaningful to me in a way that almost took my breath away, and encouraged me greatly- and very specifically, as is becoming usual! 🙂 Thank you so much for what you share- for allowing Him to move and speak through you. I know something of how hard it is to allow oneself to become vulnerable on a public forum.

    • Jamal Jivanjee April 7, 2014 at 6:53 pm

      Jenny, thanks so much for your encouraging words, and thanks for reading the blog. I’m very glad this resonated with your spirit. Blessings to you:)

    • Shelby Shock-Marsh April 7, 2014 at 11:24 pm

      Jenny, your words beautifully portray how i also see Jamal’s heart & how his posts effect me & illuminate God’s heart. Thanks for sharing!

  5. Kenneth Dawson April 7, 2014 at 6:55 pm

    I loved that part about that dammed veil being ripped in always have such a great way of expressing touch my postmodern mind set..roll on bro.

  6. “Woe is me, for I am ruined! . . . For my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts.”

    Isaiah 6:5

  7. Love knock so gently on the door, and once Love enters, or we enter Love, we welcome the Thief with open arms

  8. This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing it publicly. I feel many need to hear this. Many believers still do not know how the Lord loves. I shared it on my FB page to encourage others. You are a blessing.

    • Jamal Jivanjee April 17, 2014 at 4:06 pm


      Thanks so much for your comment. I am really glad that you liked this article. The Lord’s love for us in one another is truly amazing.

    • Jamal Jivanjee April 17, 2014 at 4:08 pm

      Also, welcome to the blog. Just curious, how did you hear about the blog?

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